Ah yes the Porshe Boxter, great noise, but tends to look like it's been trodden on at some point necessitating the driver to lie down, raising her head occasionally to consult the Sat-Nav.  In the summer months they are largely inhabited by ageing men in the ubiquitous baseball cap and Oakleys, accompanied by much younger blondes clad in Max Mara and Gucci that the wife doesn't know about. She's stuck on the M5 in the 4WD with the kids, (one in pink),visiting her mother.

And me?  Well this Macarroni got seriously shafted by the French, which would sound quite exciting but for the fact I'm talking financially.  Bugger.... bought a Renault Megan Scenic on a 'special deal' which turned out to be more exspensive than the debt of an African nation. However it's got two things going for it......

1) It's not pink.

2)It's practical.  (Now I know I'm old....bugger).

Inside and out  it has the same aesthetic characteristics as the vehicle owned by my cattle farming friend but without the blood, well, unless we've had a really bad day.  And whilst it has a good safety record, (sounding even older), it's the car most likely to break down, the AA Relay guy cheerily informed me on a labouriously slow journey back up the M3 on day. However all is not lost, one of the great joys of a 1.6 engine, actually the only joy, is that once you finally reach 80-m.p.h not years, just feels like it - and if this coincides with you being in the outside lane, you've reached your optimum velocity, then all you do is wait.........in a short time it's there, two cms from your boot......the builders chav wagon. You hold your nerve.  One flash, an illegal overtake on the inside manoeuvre, and he's gone, revealing the prize ....