Got back to Miss Monkey-Lovers after staying with the lovely Lady Godiva.  Had a great time at her family party and had a bit of texting tennis with her brother who is gorgeous.  I have known her for nearly 15 years and had never met him before.  However, I think I need someone closer to home as 500 miles is a little far to pop for a date.....

Had a total nightmare trying to sort out pictures to put with the blurb for my dating site profile.  We took some around MML's flat on the mobile, some looked great, but in one I looked like I had the arms of a Hungarian shot-putter, and another one I had such a pathetic simpering look on my face I made Little Miss Muffet look like the Wicked Witch of the West.  Eventually we decided to take the pic from my Facebook page, crop it (to remove the pole I look like I am dancing round) and use that -  I mean, for a couple of smart career gals how hard could that be?......

Cut to two hours and many a swear word later and all we have managed to do is save it as a bitmap (whatever that is), then as a J-peg but it came out so tiny on the site it looked like a stamp.  Nightmare.  We were like a couple of daft birds with the IT skills of a ferret. 

Finally we managed to get it all on.  I am now 35 years old (must meet in place with 'friendly' lighting), I am also slender (I'll wire my teeth together before the first date), and I am also marriage material (I think this sounds desperado, so when we work out how to edit the profile we'll take that off).  Honesty is very very high up on my list - however I don't see anything wrong with being a little economic with the truth.....

Was really looking forward to getting online and within ten mins expected a few messages at least, but annoyingly the site need to check everything before they post it up and it is bank holiday so I'll have to wait 24 hours at least.   Had another look at the guys and girls, there seems to be a ratio of at least 2 guys to one girl, so someone like the hot fireman is going to be swamped and will prob opt for a foxy 25 year old, instead of an ageing Barbie like my good self, but then Miss Monkey-Lover said that I would get bored of the fireman very quickly and should be looking for someone real, deep and potentially long term (mind you he's a total hottie, so even if it did take a week to get bored it might be the best week of my life - and possibly his too....)

Ok, so spoke to Edwina who I haven't spoken to for ages.  She is getting married!!!!!  I asked who to - was it the French guy she went on a blind date with earlier in the year but no.  It is a new guy.  Delighted for her and even more determined to find Mr Right (instead of Mr Horribly-Wrong). 

Miss Monkey-Lover is putting me on a website so is writing up a blub which is really weird to have someone you know so well writing how they see you.  We had a good laugh about what she would write if she really told the truth.  It might go something like this.......

Good Sense of Humour - She loves taking the piss out of everyone, especially herself and can often be found laughing like a drain in the corner of a bar telling lairy jokes (like the one about the girl who has a flat chest and wants massive boobs - it's a blinder)

Life and Soul of the Party - She does love getting hammered and has not been adverse to a good gurn.....

Gets on with everyone - lock up your brothers.....

Adventerous - well, the kleptomania is almost under control.....

Independent - Currently owns two cats and is hoping to find someone so she doesn't turn into a mad old lady who ends up with 50 stinky cats, dies in her house and is found 6 weeks later when they have half chewed up her corpse.....

Miss Monkey-Lover did an amazing job and wrote some really lovely heart felt things. I was really choked up and only hope that I can live up to them.  It was perfect, not too long, not too funny, not too deep, but honest.  Lets hope it attracts the right kind of guys.

Trawled through the website looking at potential men and yes, there are some hotties on there - plus a few who look like they have bodies under the patio too.  Decied to lie about my age, although I am knocking on a bit I am still looking good (dontcha just love that botox).  I guess I was just a bit of a late developer emotionally, and  wanted to travel and get on at work.  It's only now that I have done all that that I am ready to actually share  my life and ready to be there for someone else too.  I think I have been really selfish to boyfriends in the past.  I love my family and friends and would give them anything but I have not let anyone get close in the boyfriend stakes as I was scared before of being hurt.  Anyway, enough of the pop psychology, what I am saying is that I am now ready to think of compromise as not just the 'C' word.

Miss Monkey-Lover and I had a good old gander at the competition and there are some really lovely girls on the site.  We reckon everyone lies about their age as Karen 36 looks like her pension collecting days are not too far away.  We also laughed about putting things up about the other girls like 'my friend is honest and caring - unlike Karen 36 who has genital warts and has slept with the entire local footie squad'.  A few of the girls looked a bit desperate, so we joked about putting pictures of me on the site in a wedding dress or with a cushion up my top..... but seriously all joking aside I actually feel quite scared but quite excited about the whole dating thing.  We decided that when I go on there I shouldn't add anyone onto my list of favourites but see who comes to me.  

We are putting up my pics tomorrow and will get the whole thing off the ground.  What have I let myself in for?

Ok, so it is not 'Last Chance Saloon'.....not just yet, but it is certainly in the post.  With a big birthday approaching It's time for this chick to hang up her Jimmy Choos and look for someone to settle down with. 

If there is a Mr Right out there then I am going to find him.  I am going to be pro-active, get rid of the bit on the side and look for someone who could be good husband material, good father material and is a proper decent person.   The kind of guys I have been out with before are all wrong wrong wrong. I was never ready before, but I am going to put the feelers out and dip my toe in that big scary and exciting dating pool.

I will set out a list of boxes to be ticked so I know what I am looking for, and what's more I am going to do something I always thought was for saddos and weirdos - I am going to internet date........